Dangerous grief drips

through a punctured soul.

Sucked into a pain

that cannot breathe.

I’m trapped in a body that can

no longer speak; only howl.

Emptiness hangs from bones

and peels the layers of me away.

Personhood erased by SAD

until only fear remains.

Courage brittle and dry

folds in on itself and crumbles away.

Memories now like water or air:

nothing that can be just HELD.

Sun shines cold

and I’ve forgotten how to pray.

Withhold my darkness

Just withhold my night.

Originally written 2006; revised 2020